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The internet and technology have totally changed sex and relationships, we know you — you adults, anyway, this column is not for children! In order to answer them, we've asked our friend Stoya — a professional sex-haver — to field any inquiries. I have never actually had a long conversation with a girl, let alone dated any.

I’m very introverted and almost never venture out and have a small friend circle to show for it, though I do love traveling.

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One partner has done something he or she thinks is perfectly normal and within the bounds of marital bliss, but the other partner feels deeply betrayed by the act, which results in profound emotional pain, sporadic rancor—sometimes simmering, sometimes explosive—and the loss of relationship trust and emotional intimacy.

And until fidelity and relationship boundaries are adequately defined, the couple’s issues have no chance to abate.

In the 21st century, with our increasingly digital lives, the once-clear line between monogamy and sexual or romantic infidelity has become rather blurry.

As a psychotherapist specializing in sex and intimacy issues, I regularly see couples in conflict about what does and does not constitute cheating.

As such, I have developed a definition of cheating for digital age that might help couples clarify what is and is not acceptable within the bounds of their relationship: Please notice that this definition does not directly refer to affairs, pornography, strip clubs, hookup apps, sexting, webcams, flirting, chatting, fantasizing, or any other specific sexual or romantic act.

Instead, it focuses on what matters most to you, your partner, and your relationship—the emotional distancing, the sense of intimate betrayal, and the loss of trust.

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Our research found that when it comes to the negative impact of sex and romance outside the bounds of a supposedly monogamous relationship, tech-based and real-world interactions are : The emotional pain, the sense of betrayal, and the loss of relationship trust feel exactly the same to the aggrieved partner.

Based on the results of this study—and more than 25 years of clinical experience—I have concluded that it’s not the of a sexual or romantic act that cause the most pain and do the most damage to a romantic relationship, it’s the lying, the emotional distancing, the loss of intimacy, and the disintegration of trust.

Reads the item description: “She is able to have an intimate night with her sweetheart again.” Oh, and to answer your next question: Yes, there is space in the ashes-dildo case for an i Phone.

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